Recently I saw some research about how other people see members of the Church. I have long been interested in this subject because I have had somewhat to do with missionary work in my Church assignments. Knowing how people see us is an important part of understanding how best to explain ourselves. This particular piece of research made an interesting observation. It suggested that members of our Church can sometimes appear very defensive to those who are not members of the Church. One respondent went as far as to say that when Mormons are explaining their beliefs, their language is in terms that suggest they are expecting criticism.
I’m going to give you two suggestions for how to engage in conversations nondefensively.
First suggestion: Don’t let irrelevant issues drown out the more important subjects.
Our Church members have too often allowed others to set the conversational agenda. An example is polygamy. This ended in the Church as an official practice in 1890. It’s now 2009. Why are we still talking about it? It was a practice. It ended. We moved on. If people ask you about polygamy, just acknowledge it was once a practice but not now, and that people shouldn’t confuse any polygamists with our Church. In ordinary conversations, don’t waste time trying to justify the practice of polygamy during the Old Testament times or speculating as to why it was practiced for a time in the 19th century. Those may be legitimate topics for historians and scholars, but I think we simply reinforce the stereotypes when we make it a primary topic of conversations about the Church.
I realize that sometimes these conversations are triggered by stories that appear in the media. That doesn’t change anything. Earlier this year a TV cable network series about polygamists depicted the sacred temple ceremony. That portrayal caused great concern among Church members, which is understandable. We were all offended by it.
But I refer you to an article in response that was placed by the Public Affairs Department of the Church on its Newsroom Web site at that time. As I quote from it, please listen to the tone. There is nothing defensive about it, yet it was responding to an inappropriate portrayal of one of our most sacred religious ceremonies:
“Like other large faith groups, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints sometimes finds itself on the receiving end of attention from Hollywood or Broadway, television series or books, and the news media. Sometimes depictions of the Church and its people are quite accurate. Sometimes the images are false or play to stereotypes. Occasionally, they are in appallingly bad taste.
“As Catholics, Jews, and Muslims have known for centuries, such attention is inevitable once an institution or faith group reaches a size or prominence sufficient to attract notice.” The article then goes on to discourage the idea of an organized boycott of the network or affiliated businesses, which was being actively promoted among some of our members on the Internet.
Continuing the Newsroom quote:
“The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints as an institution does not call for boycotts. Such a step would simply generate the kind of controversy that the media loves and in the end would increase audiences for the series. …
“Latter-day Saints should conduct themselves with dignity and thoughtfulness. Not only is this the model that Jesus Christ taught and demonstrated in His own life, but it also reflects the reality of the strength and maturity of Church members today. … If the Church allowed critics and opponents to choose the ground on which its battles are fought, it would risk being distracted from the focus and mission it has pursued successfully for nearly 180 years. Instead, the Church itself will determine its own course as it continues to preach the restored gospel of Jesus Christ throughout the world.”
Let me give you another example in recent memory. A year or two ago an independent film group made a movie about the Mountain Meadows Massacre. To describe this as a really bad “B” movie would be generous. Frankly, it was just awful — even the Hollywood critics panned it. The promoters did everything they could to provoke the Church into making it a major topic of conversation. In fact, we completely ignored it. We refused to allow them to set the agenda. The result: a big flop at the box office and presumably a lot of red ink in the promoters’ bank accounts. Meanwhile, we continue to respond and to reach out in constructive and intelligent ways with the descendants of those who were involved in those terrible events at Mountain Meadows.
And recently the Church has published a well-researched book titled Massacre at Mountain Meadows which documents the facts surrounding this tragedy.
Now my second suggestion to you is to emphasize that Latter-day Saints follow Jesus Christ and what Jesus Christ teaches. We try to follow Him in all that we do.
When all is said and done, the most important thing about you and your testimony is that you base your beliefs on what Jesus Christ taught, and you try to follow Him by living your life in a way acceptable to our Heavenly Father and to the Lord.
This is your foundation. It was Joseph Smith’s foundation. He said: “The fundamental principles of our religion are the testimony of the Apostles and Prophets, concerning Jesus Christ, that He died, he was buried, and rose again the third day, and ascended into heaven; and all other things which pertain to our religion are only appendages to it.”
Whenever you are having a conversation about the Church, you should try to make this a point. We follow Jesus Christ. We try to live as He taught. That’s the basis of our faith and our lives. This is the strongest nondefensive position you can take. You don’t have to defend or justify anything when you are basing your position on the teachings of the Son of God and the fact that you are doing your best to keep His commandments.
It is a great blessing to have the doctrines of Jesus Christ, which are clear to those who study the scriptures and embrace His teachings. As we follow the doctrine of the Lord Jesus Christ, we come to know that all of us are the children of God and He loves us. By following Christ we know where we came from before we were born, we know our purpose for being here on the earth, and we know where we will go when we leave this earth life. The plan of salvation is clear; it is God’s plan for the eternal happiness of His children.
There are commandments that God has given for men and women to live by. They are His commandments, and no one is authorized to change them except by direct revelation to God’s chosen prophet.
People throughout the world are drifting further and further away from the teachings of the Lord toward a secular society that the apostle Paul described:
“For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine; but after their own lusts shall they heap to themselves teachers having itching ears; and they shall turn away their ears from the truth” (2 Timothy 4:3–5).
Today is the day and the time Paul saw. There is an ever-growing number of people who believe that there is no God, no Christ, no plan of redemption, no Atonement, no repentance, no forgiveness, no life after death, no resurrection, no eternal life, no eternal families sealed together forever.
How empty life must be without the blessings of the fulness of the restored gospel of Jesus Christ? Now my brothers and sisters, we follow Jesus Christ. We know the plan of happiness, the great plan of redemption through the Lord Jesus Christ. You graduates know the doctrines of Jesus Christ. You must strive now and always to live by them. Upon your generation will rest the responsibility to teach the doctrines of the Lord and to know how to build up His Church. Please remember you do not need to feel like you must justify your beliefs; you simply need to explain them in the spirit of love and kindness. The truth always prevails when true doctrine is taught.
Now here are just a few examples:
- We follow Jesus Christ’s doctrine of service to our fellow man. We serve both our members and those who are not. The great work we do in humanitarian service throughout the world relieves suffering and hardship. We do all we can, sharing our resources of time and money to meet the needs of both our members and those of other faiths recognizing that “inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me” (Matthew 25:40).
- We follow Jesus Christ’s doctrine of striving to live the Word of Wisdom, which is a sound way to enjoy a healthy physical body. We avoid drug abuse of all kinds because our bodies are the house of our eternal spirits and happiness in this life is obtained by being spiritually strong and physically healthy.
- We follow Jesus Christ by living the law of chastity. God gave this commandment, and He has never revoked it nor changed it. This law is clear and simple. No one is to engage in sexual relationships out of the bounds the Lord has set. This applies to homosexual behavior of any kind and to heterosexual relationships outside of marriage. It is a sin to violate the law of chastity.
- We follow Jesus Christ by adhering to God’s law of marriage, which is marriage between a man and a woman. This commandment has been in place from the very beginning. God said, “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh” (Genesis 2:24). God instructed Adam and Eve that they were to “be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it” (Genesis 1:28).
Modern-day prophets and apostles reaffirmed this command in “The Family: A Proclamation to the World,” issued in 1995:
“God has commanded that the sacred powers of procreation are to be employed only between man and woman, lawfully wedded as husband and wife. … The family is ordained of God. Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan.”
- We follow Jesus Christ and teach the first principles of the gospel and all of the other wonderful doctrines of the restoration that when embraced and lived bring peace, joy and happiness to the sons and daughters of God.
